There are many types of fear,
fear of failure, heights, Wind turbines, small or large dogs, fear of not getting or getting a promotion? What fears do you fight almost every day that keeps you from applying for promotions, working at a dog shelter, or climbing that mountain?
I will tell you that I have a fear of wind turbines! Every time I drive by one, my stomach turns. It sounds weird, and I agree, but I can't shake the feeling.
How did I deal with that issues?
The first thing I learned was that I needed to work on myself. I needed to spend more time learning who I was and what I know I could bring to the table.
1) Work on yourself - Again, Charles is there waiting. He took the oath to be the naysayer when everyone else wasn't around. He lurks in the back of your mind, so excited to knock you down. So have those conversations with your Charles, don't let him win! Tell him to shut up and then tell him why you can do what you set out to do.
Once you've learned to work on yourself, you can start shutting down the negative thoughts.
2) Must have courage - Just talking to that voice is not enough; you have to start believing in yourself. It will help you build courage. Start facing those things you fear. Last year a friend of mine had a friend that works on wind turbines. I asked if he would talk to his friend about getting me up close and personal with a turbine. Four months later, I found myself heading straight into the lion's mouth. I thought I was going to spew all over this guy's truck. We spent about an hour there as he explained how it worked. I walked away, embarrassed and proud of myself for having the courage to face that fear!
3) Develop a habit.
When you develop a habit of facing your fears or insecurities, You will start to build yourself up.
Your habit of shutting down the negative talk will move you forward far more than you might think possible. Don't start something and then drop it after a month or even six months. Keep at it! Habits take time; how much time? That depends on you how much time you're willing to invest in yourself.
4) Honor your word!
How often do you break your promise to your partner, brother, sister, or best friend? Do you tell them, "call me anytime you need something," but then never have the time when they do call? Most of us would say, "No, I would drop what I'm doing to help." Is this you? Why are you not doing it for the one that matters above all your friends and family? YOU! Most of us are so loving and caring toward others that we forget about ourselves. Make this promise,
"I promise to allow myself to be happy. I promise to call on others when I'm in need. I promise to take care of me."
Repeat this to yourself, put it somewhere that you see it every day, and "Honor Your Word" to yourself!
Remember, we all have fears that we face every day, and as long as we continue to work on ourselves, build the courage to face our challenges, develop a habit to meet those challenges, and honor our word to ourselves. Those fears that seemed too big to conquer will soon become molehills!